Good morning Good morning

I need a better joooobbbb! 150 a week is not enough some one hire me before i work at Hungry Jacksss

I know your sick of hearing it.

but I have not been this happy in a very long time. its very addictive feeling this happy. I love you, simple as that.

Thursday night.

Please not the fullness of everything now! hurray for having my things!

you can see my little thermos here next to my books! I hope it holds up today!

finally off work had time to do everything I should have been doing all week.
Went out for milkshakes at darbystreet but was unaware of the nice location, so I wore my dads old shirt and ugg boots. was lovely fun.
Decided to find a double matress of the street tommrow, from pick up.
Then went to waynes and read a book about america in the 70s while he finished an essay, its pretty brilliant not being a uni student most of the time.

Im going to meet wayne for lunch today, Im excited to finally use my little thermos.
Here are some pictures of my new room then I really must get ready!

Straberry fizz.

It had me at the frosty floral bottle. it kept me with the scent of fresh strawberries, and proceeded to run me over with its high alcohol content.

I'm at home, in coffs I mean and amongst such things as cheap wine, russh magazine in a lavender scented bath and olives by the truck load,
I have realised how very difficult and insecure phone talking makes me.

I don't know if everyone has this problem, Id like to think yes because i always think that about my problems so i feel a bit better.
but even talking to boy i had trouble. I feel as if i regressed and am talking like my 14 year old self to my msn crush who i have never had the courage to seek out in the playground but bombard constantly with inane calls about what shows are on telly and what I had for lunch.

I came up with what I thought was a solution, which was ending the conversation when there is even the slightest hint of a silence, be it awkward or breath pause.

"and yeah"
....

"well this is awkward I'm going, bye!"
* hangs up quickly before sentiments can be expressed or anything of that nature could come about, making it even worse then before.

Here is another true phone scenario from yours truly.

"yep well bye" *goes to hang up with super human speed but hears mumbling from other end of the line.
"huh...? i mean... what did you say...?"

"I said, i love you.."

"what? you love me?"

"oh never mind."

I don't know how i ever did the long distance, even for a while.

stay tuned for my drunken ramblings from your favorite person you see in the shops but don't know enough to say hello

XOXO me,.

List

Things I have to do before I move out.

1. Buy powder blue coat from retro metro (check)

2. Get the rest of my things (three bags full.) to Greta's house.. (they are in garbage bags, i don't know how to get them to her house yet..) (check... bus, train, 2o minute walk, simones help, get the bags to the lovely keshias house.)

3. Clean hair dye stain from carpet. (check)

4. Clean hair dye stain(s) from wall. (check)

5. Vacuum hair from all over the house when I walked around cutting it the other day (hi have we met? I'm the worst house mate ever.) (check)

6. Finish trying to squeeze everything into to two suitcase and a back pack.

7. Go to the Gods and Goddesses party on Friday night and help Simone make loads of new friends so she can go out with them of a weekend, ergo making me feel less guilty about leaving. (check... kind of... the party sucked)

(As I was leaving they mentioned they had many rooms that needed to be filled, maybe you should just migrate to west tower Simone?)

8. Go visit Julia and Lauren one last time. (check)

9. Go to the lifestyle markets and get a churro with whipped cream and icing sugar.

10. Return all library books.

11. spend hours upon hours with Greta.

11. clean entire house for leaving inspection.

12.Have one last night in the valley and finally suck it up and pay the five dollars to get into the family and birdies, which apparently you cant go out in Brisbane without. (ended up staying in but had great/better night... so check.)

(when home before Newcastle)

13. Eat a nothing but meat.

14. Spend countless quality time with pets and sister so neither of them forgets you to quickly.

15. Ring up health-food shops/chemists in Newcastle.

16. Ring Centrelink.

17. Ring prospective rooms available in Newcastle.

18. spend as much time as can with Carlota.

19. See *shudder* Janet.. *necks self.

20. op-shop a little while its cheap and you have the chance.

That's it. I'm feeling a little down because now i know for my whole life I'm going to have one of those, but what would have happened if i would have stayed in Brisbane type question, damn you Robert Frost for putting the idea so fluently and permanently in my brain. Instead of being able to relate to you, you have cursed me with the affliction of questioning every decision I make. The worst part Is I forgot to even fucking use your poem in the HSC.


also, Shelley Duvall is the thing/person/book/music/movie/pop culture reference, which has currently taken priority one in my heart strings.

I'm free, but not with out a cost

I'm finally out of the lease here, all i had to do was give up 800 dollars! It was worth it.
Now I'm going home Tuesday, then Newcastle Thursday, very exciting.
Big last weekend in El valley planned! ill write more once I'm settled on somewhere, but that's whats happening anyway!

we are all borrowed time.

have not blogged for a while. nothing really that new has happened.
I'm still struggling here big time. I'm sinking deeper and deeper into debts and the more I kick to try and bring myself back on top the more I end up exhausted after a day of running around the city and with a bank account of 84 cents to show for it, with rent due in three days.

I cant handle this, if things don't pick up soon I'm going home then to Newcastle sooner, I may end up in the same situation but at least the rent there will be a hell of a lot cheaper.

I went and visited Lauren and Julia's campus the other day, that was fun. Met there friends, all very nice. got to drunk, and wore a dress that Lauren's mum made, it was a lovely high necked sleeveless 60s gold sequin number, a bit overdressed for sitting in her room drinking goon but i was past the point of caring.

Wayne came and visited which was fun as expected, walked around the city went to the french film festival at the library blah blah blah.

nothing else left to say, except maybe the idea of hurling myself into oncoming traffic does not seem to bad to me lately.